Don’t let the grin fool you. I’m a very serious person. Very serious. I live in the Bay Area. Which is purple. This is a picture of the Bay Bridge during a particularly purple sunset.
I wasn’t actually born in the purple part of California. I was born in the green part of the Pacific. New Zealand to be precise.
New Zealand is full of very serious people. You can tell by the proliferation of Bungee jumping and Hokey Pokey ice cream.
We are also very creative. Why else would we name both ourselves, and a major export after a small, fuzzy bird? You’ve probably met (and/or eaten) Kiwis before. You can find us on every continent. This is because we are compelled to venture beyond the isolated and tiny boundaries of our native country to distant parts of the globe. Which is ironic because the original Kiwi is permanently grounded due to an unfortunate lack of wings.
I am also creative. Which is why I came up with this crazy great story about a kick-ass girl who travels back in time to hang out with some amazing historical heroes. I thought it would make an awesome TV show. Then a serious friend said to me: “Nobody reads scripts. You need to write the book.” So I wrote the book.
I think you should buy my book. You’ll like it. Everybody who has read it likes it. Even people who are not serious.
You can buy my book here.